Friday, November 6, 2009

Why "Fun Size" Isn't So Fun After All.

Being a pregnant woman I tend to think about food a lot. What to eat, what not to eat, when to eat it, all while trying to keep my appetite in check so I don't end up looking like a beached whale by the end of this whole experiment with procreation.

With the passing of Halloween and Trick or Treat, my crazy pregnant lady thoughts have turned to candy. I'm not a huge sweets person, but I love Halloween candy as much as the next 23 year old who sometimes likes to pretend she's still a kid. Did I say that out loud? Yes, I did.

Here's my kvetch: "Fun size" candy ain't so fun. Nothing thrills me more than eating a single square of snickers which is exactly 1" by 1" in dimension. It's SO fun. Yeah right. Or how 'bout yesterday when I had a Kit Kat. *A* Kit Kat. It was a single stick that was approximately 2 inches in length. What is that all about?!

So, instead of having a nice little chocolatey treat you actually end up having to tear open about 6 of them to get your sugar fix and even though they're tiny seeing all those discarded wrappers makes me feel like I've done something very naughty. And I KNOW that it's the candy getting smaller, not me getting bigger because I don't even remember seeing a single Kit Kat stick option in "fun size" until this year. 2 sticks? Sure. One stick that's shorter than normal? Uncalled for.

Back in the day when I had to walk 15 miles uphill to Trick or Treat it was a REAL treat to get a name brand mini-candy bar in your bag. It didn't seem as widespread to hand out name brand candy as it is now when you hardly even see off brand options! Or maybe those were just the cheap people in my neighborhood... I digress. The point is, I really enjoyed those darn fun sized candy bars! You could enjoy a Snickers, a Reese's Cup, and a Milky Way all at once! Now, I'm just really annoyed by the fact that they keep getting smaller and smaller, but the prices seem to be staying stagnant or going in the other direction and getting higher.

I move that no overly-tiny candy bar be falsely labelled as "fun size" and they instead refer to them using the following adjectives:

Lilliputian, bitsy, bitty, diminutive, insignificant, itty-bitty, microscopic, mini, minikin, minuscule, minute, negligible, pee-wee, petite, pint-sized, puny, slight, teensy or wee.

*Sigh* if only I ran the world. This would definitely be on my list of remedies.