Waiting is the Hardest Part [40 weeks, 3 days]

Yes, Tom Petty you had it correct all along. Sadly, I'm just coming to realize that this is the hardest part of pregnancy - the very end. I'm still very pregnant and sick to boot. I'm in pain, gross things are happening with my body, and I'm so anxious to meet this child that I just can't stand it! Mostly, I just want him here so that I know for sure that all is well and he's healthy!

I've pretty much given up hope of going into labor on my own. I'm not sure WHY my body isn't getting the message that this is the end of the road and I'm certain that the baby is uncomfortable in my ute having outgrown his home, but still no contractions :(

At this point, I'm just looking forward to Sunday. I'm scheduled for a 2-step labor induction Sunday night. First, they insert a catheter into my cervix to force it to dilate (I'm sure this will be great...) and then, once I dilate to where they want me (I'm not yet sure what this is) they'll start me on the pitocin to force active labor.

This is not at all how I wanted my labor and delivery to go, but it's not really something I can control. As long as the baby gets here and he's healthy that's all that really matters in the end. I can deal with being strapped to a bed for 12+ hours with nothing but medical intervention if it yields a good outcome.

I keep reminding myself that there's still time. Maybe the baby is just faking us out and he'll wait to Saturday night or Sunday morning and then my labor will start. That would really be nice!

The odd thing is although I've been looking forward to meeting the baby for so long, I'm 3 days past my due date and the doctors gave every indication that I would probably not even make it to my due date in the first place, it has not yet registered that we will (probably) have our baby by Monday!

Today is Mark's last day of work before he's taking 2 weeks off to stay home with me and the baby. We have today and tomorrow and then we are off to the hospital to become parents! I don't know... maybe it's because it's just so clinical and not the way I had imagined or planned for. I'm not sure at what point it will sink in, but the good thing about my brain not realizing what's going on is that I'm not getting overly excited or anxious. It allows me to keep relaxed for the time being.

I can't believe that the baby won't be here until March! At least we'll have a couple more days to get over our colds.

Baby Watch 2010 - Update [40 weeks, 1 day]

I saw my doctor today at the appointment I swore last week I would not be at because certainly I would not be pregnant past my due date. Ha.

I'm STILL at 2 cms dilated, 80% effaced. Again I got the, "WOW! His head is so low" exclamation. Yeah, that's what you alllll say. That's what you've been saying for weeeeeks now and I'm well aware of how low he is, but why isn't he coming out?!

I requested that she sweep my membranes, which by the way was SUPER uncomfortable. I have read about this procedure quite a bit and I knew that I didn't want to attempt it until I had at least reached my due date. Well now is the time so hopefully we'll see some action! The doctor said that there's about a 50/50 chance of this working to jump start my labor. If it does work I should go into labor tonight or tomorrow at the latest. Right now, I am VERY sore and crampy. I really hope that this turns into something and I'm not uncomfortable for nothing.

Additionally, the big "I" was thrown out there. Yep, induction. According to my doctor they don't like you to go past 41 weeks gestation. If I don't go on my own by the end of this weekend I would need to be induced or go in on Monday for an ultrasound and a non-stress test (where they hook you up to monitors) to make sure that all is well with the baby. She also said that they would not let me go past 42 weeks for any reason. The good news is that she said my body is VERY ready to have this baby and she thinks that all I need is some contractions to get started and then labor should progress beautifully.

With that information we decided to tentatively schedule an induction for Sunday night (February 28th). I'm not 100% at peace with this decision, but on the other hand it makes me feel so much better emotionally to know that there is an end in sight. The doctor said that I can change my mind and cancel the induction. I'm just not sure what I want yet! I know that I really, REALLY want to go into labor naturally and have as few interventions as possible. On the other hand I'm so physically miserable right now and emotionally exhausted as well. If I don't go into labor on my own prior to Sunday evening is it even worth waiting another week if I end up having to be induced at 42 weeks instead of 41? THAT would be a huge disappointment!

I'm really just hoping that I go into labor on my own, the sooner the better! But ultimately, the important thing is that the baby comes out happy and healthy however that may be accomplished.

Also, want proof that the Universe hates me? Sunday night Mark came down with a nasty cold. We have both (especially him!) been so careful throughout this pregnancy about germs. We've both managed to avoid the seasonal flu, H1N1, all other sorts of nasty things that float around this time of year and now that the baby is supposed to be here any time Mark gets sick! So of course, last night I woke up with cold symptoms as well. That's right, I'm now terribly uncomfortable and in pain, past my due date, AND I have a cold that I can't take anything for because my baby won't come out!!! To say it's not fair is a bit of an understatement in my current opinion.

Happy Due Date to Me [40 weeks, 0 days]

Baby's still not here. I'm still uncomfortable. And we're still waiting. That's all the update I have. Really wish I had more...

Yesterday in the mail I received a letter from the hospital at which I'm planning to deliver (if the baby ever decides to make an arrival!!!) asking that I prepay for the stay that I've not yet had. To make the process smoother I can pay an estimated $800+ for my care and an estimated $300 for the baby's care. These are the estimated out of pocket expenses after the insurance company pays their portion. Gee, thanks so much for giving me this opportunity!

Do they think I have idiot tattooed on my forehead? I'm not prepaying for anything! A) I didn't get an itemized list of expenses, just a one page letter indicating that I should use the handy enclosed envelope (::eye roll::) to fork over nearly $1200 for a hospital stay and procedures I haven't even had yet! B) Estimated costs? You've GOT to be kidding me? I don't pay $1200 out of pocket on demand for estimated costs! I'll pay for services and procedures rendered once I know what they are and what I'm paying for. I'm not paying an estimate, I'll pay the bill once it's set in stone thank you very much.

I don't really blame the hospital. I'm sure that this is just the first communication in a long line of letters they plan to send to make sure that the patient balance is paid to them. I'm sure that in a lot of situations they will send lots and lots of letters before they see any money, if they ever do.

I'll go ahead and blame this one on the insurance company because the estimated $1200 is probably the 20% we are supposed to cover, however I'm also quite certain that that "estimate" will end up being way more out of pocket once the insurance company ends up picking through each and every procedure and pill given.

One thing that has been proven to me throughout this pregnancy is that 80/20 insurance is a myth. The insurance company just picks and chooses what to pay for and then we are responsible for all the rest. So glad we see an in-network provider. I'd hate to see out of pocket expenses for a non-approved provider. And I'll end there because I can rant about the state of medical insurance in this country for as long as there are people to listen.

Moral of the story? Sending a very uncomfortable, very pregnant woman who has officially passed her due date a letter asking that I pay for the birth of a baby that quite possibly may NEVER come out of my body is not a wise thing. Hospitals should note that they should hit people up for money once the baby is actually here and the people who are to be forking over the cash are in a sparkly state of falling in love with their newborn! It probably won't make people as angry!

Call Me Crazy, But Mark Will Have Fresh Pits for Cheap!

I can't remember if I've mentioned this here before or not, but I love couponing. I'm the crazy person that WILL drive to multiple Walgreens to stock up on 9 packages of $2 name-brand toilet paper (true story) when there's a sale I can match with a great coupon. I like getting things as cheap as possible and it's even better if it's free or nearly free!

I get a rush from this. I describe it to Mark as follows: it's like when "your guy" (i.e. your fantasy [insert random sport here] player) does something awesome to score you a bunch of points. Woohoo TOUCHDOWN! Now might be the time to call me crazy...

Anyhoo, let's talk about my recent good deal. Behold, cheap deodorant!

I actually can only take credit for the planning on this one. Mark (who usually rolls his eyes - actually... if you know Mark, he does a lot of eye rolling... - and for some reason typically discourages my stock up couponing) was the one who went out to make the purchase for me! I'm just not getting around very well due to the baby that's seemingly trying to force it's way out of my body without allowing me to go into labor first, but that's another story.

We purchased all of the above for $7.28 (including tax), which is $1.21 per stick! This is a great deal as they are usually priced at $3.99 each! We saved $17.47 and Mark will probably have enough deodorant for the rest of the year : )

Side note: Why is it that toiletries are SO DARN expensive?! Have you ever noticed this? Good deodorant, razors, face wash, all that stuff is just so unnecessarily expensive. It drives me crazy! All the more reason to keep your eyes peeled for good deals and stock up prices.

How to score this deal:

Walgreens has Right Guard deodorant on sale Buy One, Get One Free this week (February 21 - 27)

- Use the $2 off 2 printable coupon available HERE (FYI - you should be able to print this coupon 2 times per computer)

and/or

- Use the $1.50 off 1 printable coupon available HERE (Click on "All Star Savings")

And voila! Cheap deodorant! In my opinion, this is a stock up price!

Thanks to Money Saving Mom for the heads up on this deal!

Nesting? [39 weeks, 3 days]

Is it possible that I've kicked in to full on pre-labor nesting mode?

Today I have:

- changed bed sheets and made the bed
- emptied and re-loaded the dishwasher
- took out the trash and recycling
- declutted the kitchen table
- wiped down the counters
- cleaned dog slobber off the front windows
- dusted (for the 2nd time this week)
- vacuumed

Now, I'm thinking positive thoughts and hoping this means labor is impending. I AM feeling more energized and motivated than usual, but this may also have to do with the fact that I had my first good night of sleep last night in like 3 weeks and the sun is actually shining outside for the first time in about a month. We'll see.

Vancooooooouver

In my opinion, that's the best part of the Olympics - saying 'Vancouver' in an exaggerated Canadian accent.

I'm pretty sure I'm the only person who really doesn't care about the Olympics at. all. Much like the fact that I've lived in Columbus all of my life, attended OSU, yet could not care less about Buckeye football. Yeah, I said it.

Clearly I'm not a sports person and the Olympics are just more of the same, but what's even worse is the sports that are played are obscure activities like the eleventy-billion different skiing events they have played by athletes I've never heard of before.

In fact, the only thing that I DO care about is that the Olympics mess with my shows. Many of the shows that I like to watch are on yet another week or two-long hiatus because they don't want to go up against the Olympics by which most people are oddly facinated. I just don't get it.

No News. [39 weeks, 1 day]

Just got home from the doctor and basically I have made zero progress since last week. I really wanted to hear that I had made some progress, but I also know that my cervix isn't a great indicator of when I'll go into labor. So we're still at "it could happen any time" and we're in full on (annoying) waiting mode.

They did say that my blood pressure was slightly elevated. This is the first time that it hasn't been at a totally normal level so lucky me, I got to pee in a cup and give blood. It was a super fun appointment. ::shakes head no::

The doctor suggested that I take time to rest more. I advised her that all I do is rest. Lordy! I hardly get out of bed anymore because I'm so uncomfortable! And you know what? I'm not going to rest. I'm going to clean my house because it's an absolute wreck because I have been resting. So there!

::Kicks Snow:: [39 weeks, 0 days]

Stupid weather. Due to the 20 feet of snow that has been accumulating outside since yesterday morning my doctor's office is closed today. So... I will not be going to the doctor and I will not be told that I'm making progress. I'm going to have to spend another day just guessing at what is, or isn't, going on.

I just want to know that something is happening. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!?!?!?

I think not.

*sigh*

We did make time to meet with the baby's pediatrician-to-be today. It's the same practice that I went to as a child (not this doctor though) and my niece and brother see this doctor, and the office is only about 5 or 10 minutes from our house, so we pretty much knew that this is where we'd end up. We got all of our questions answered and are all ready to go now.

Just waiting for the baby to come out... Any time would be good... Any time.

Permanently Preggers [38 weeks, 6 days]

I think I might just end up as the first woman ever to be permanently pregnant. At this point, I'm thinking it's a distinct possibility that this kid will be graduating college from my ute.

Yes, yes, I know I haven't even technically reached my due date yet, but this kid has been sitting low since THIRTY-ONE WEEKS! I have been dealing with terrible pelvic pain that has just gotten worse for the last 8 weeks. Last week, the news was that the baby's head was sitting right on my cervix and that I was progressing nicely. How have I made it another week without going into labor?! I feel like he's done cooking already!

I was supposed to have a doctors appointment today for the usual as well as a cervix check, but due to the inclement weather I rescheduled it for tomorrow afternoon. I'm desperately hoping that the doctor has good news for me. Good news being that I'm in labor.

Anyway, I don't know what the deal is, but apparently I have reached an emotional state in which no amount of rationale will comfort me. I honestly feel like this baby is never going to come out and I'm going to be pregnant forever. Intellectually, I know that the baby will come when he is ready, my body will know what to do, and I will be fully aware of labor when it finally happens. However, my crazy, 39-week pregnant, uncomfortable self just can't actually accept this rational knowledge and I have reached a new level of anxiety ridden impatience!

I want the baby to come out now zammit!

I need cookies...

Nursery Updates! [38 weeks, 4 days]

Still no sign of the baby making his arrival although I feel like he's about to fall out at any minute. Ready any time. Like now would be good.

Earlier today Mark and I made a trip to We Be Babies to get the remaining items we needed from our registry. We are so grateful for everything we got from friends and family. After coupons, we ended up spending about $120 out of pocket to get the rest of our needed baby items. Things add up SO quickly, but lucky for us we didn't have much to buy!

This afternoon Mark spent time putting together the remaining baby items that were still in boxes. This included the swing, bouncy seat, and 2 light weight strollers. Then he hung all the wall decor in the above pictures and the shelf over to the left. He was a busy bee today!

So, again, just for the record you can come any time now, Baby. Other than a load of laundry I still need to wash everything is ready and I'm sure we can manage without that load of laundry! Really... it's time for your new home now. You're being evicted from the old one.

Baby Watch 2010 - Update [37 weeks, 6 days]

Just got home from the doctor. She checked my cervix today - I won't go into detail but it was NOT fun. Trust. - She said I'm 2 cm dilated and 80% effaced (non-baby speak translation = my cervix is really thin so it should dilate soon and easily). What made me even more excited was this statement, "the baby's head is not going to get any lower until you're actually pushing him out"! She said he has dropped REALLY low and his head is right up against my cervix. I'm hoping this bodes well for a quick labor and delivery since he won't really have to drop down into my pelvis - he's already there! No wonder I'm in such pain including, but not limited to: ongoing pelvic, lower back, and hip pain, as well as terrible sharp stabbity pains that feel like they're actually in my vag.

Yes, I recognize that the above is probably TMI, but really I'm preparing to push a human from my body which is just unnecessary in and of itself ;)

I keep telling him to "swim down" and I guess he has listened. Since it doesn't sound like he can swim down any further I'm going to have to think of a new vibe to send him... I guess it's now just a matter of my water breaking and/or labor hormones kicking in!

Something interesting to note: Doctor's don't fully understand what actually triggers the onset of labor. Theories are as follows:

•The physical aging of the placenta may cause insufficient nutrients to reach the fetus.

•The uterus reaches a crucial point of distension, which may cause tension on muscle fibers and stimulate their activity.

•Nerve impulses from the uterus to the posterior pituitary gland may bring about release of oxytocin (a hormone which causes the uterus to contract).

•Decrease in the level of the hormone pregesterone, may cause uterine changes.

•Adrenal glands of the fetus, when mature, may release a substance to stimulate labor.

•The release of prostaglandin from the wall of the uterus may initiate labor.

(from SutterHealth)

Pregnancy Positives

I've had a lot of pregnancy gripes. Trust me, I'm sure my husband could make a list an arm's length long of all my complaints about aches and pains and obnoxious things like heartburn. He's been great about hearing me out and providing comfort when necessary.

So here's a side that I don't feel I've given enough credit to: the positive side of pregnancy. There are plenty of good that goes with the bad.

1) I can wear elastic pants every day and no one can judge me! I certainly don't miss pants with pesky zippers and buttons which can dig into your tummy on a bloated day. I like maternity pants! It's kind of like wearing your PJ pants to work everyday. It's Saturday morning on the top, but mid-week business on the bottom. Best of both worlds and comfy! I'm not going to lie, I will be sad once I have to go back to things with a real waist.

2) There are no more "fat" days. It's alllll out there for everyone to see! There's no hiding this great big belly that's positioned right on the front of my body! So, I don't put on an outfit and go, "Oh, this makes me look fat, I should change my shirt", or "this is a little tight, it makes my tummy look flabby". No sir, I'm round and I like it! Sure I might not feel sexy anymore with my 10 pounds of tummy, but I do feel cute everyday and that's not for nothing! Everything makes me look round because I AM round, but at least it's with a purpose! And for once, I'm totally happy with how my body looks. Added bonus, the giant tummy makes my hips and tush look smaller ; )

3) I love all the little kicks and movement I feel. Sure it can get a little annoying when you're sitting at your desk trying to focus on something and the baby is kicking you in the ribs hard enough to make you give a small gasp or when you're so exhausted after a long day and you just want to relax, but 99% of the time the movement and kicks I can feel are awesome! I love knowing that the baby is healthy in there and him moving lets me know it!

4) It's a little selfish, but I love that it's just me and the baby right now. Don't get me wrong, I CAN'T wait for Mark and the rest of the family to *finally* be able to meet the baby and fall in love with him and build strong bonds, but there is a part of me that loves that right now, I'm all my baby knows. I'm the only one with a true connection to him right now and it's a very special time. I feel like after being part of me for so long he will surely come out and know just who I am! I just hope he likes who he gets!

and 5) This is a super exciting time for Mark and I and I'm really enjoying it! All of the planning and excitement and talking about when the baby is here is so much fun. It's been so exciting to go back and forth over names and how to decorate the nursery and imagine what our baby will be like once he's here. It's a special thing that my husband and I get to share even before the baby makes his entrance into the world. All of the planning and time that we've spent on all things baby will really pay off, I just know it!

I have been extremely lucky in that I have had a very healthy pregnancy. I was pretty sick at the very beginning, but by the second trimester all that was behind me. My weight and blood pressure has been right on track. I haven't had any scary problems like gestational diabetes. I have been in some considerable discomfort/pain for the last few weeks, but honestly, I'll take it since both the baby and I have been so healthy for the last 9 months.

I certainly will not miss the bad/annoying/uncomfortable aspects of pregnancy, but there are some things that I will miss. At this point, I'm just ready to meet this kid face to face!